The Dark Age
Posted by Exile on March 28, 2009
Summer time starts officially somewhere between midnight and sunrise on Sunday, the day after tomorrow. Which is a little surprising because I’m still feeling the cold and even though the first signs of spring are to be found, it’s still bloody freezing when the wind blows. Apart from me getting one hour less in the old feather bed, I don’t suppose it will make much difference to my life.
On the other hand, the greenies all over the world are going to make an event of it all. The idea is that the whole world should switch off the lights in their households and sit for one hour in the dark. The “event”, which they call “Earth Hour”, is to start in New Zealand at 20:30 on Saturday and the hour will roll round the world meaning that all countries will be plunged into darkness at eight thirty p.m. local time, wherever they are. I’ll try to stay awake just for the sake of a little excitement. Global goings on aren’t really my forté but hey, you gotta start somewhere.
I see a few problems with all this world saving activity. I mean, there are those who are automatically excluded. For example, the Masai folks in Africa. They live in mud huts and have no electricity anyway. The Mongols on the steppes of Mongolia. The Laplander reindeer herders. The homeless. Wandering Arabs. Eskimoes. How are they to show their appreciation of mother earth and join this protest? Maybe we shouldn’t tell them. Better not to let them in on it all in the first place.
I won’t be joining in. I am going to have the lights on. All of ‘em. Even the ones I don’t need. And the TV and my computer too. I’ll let the fridge and the freezer run wild and probably turn the oven on as well. Toast might be nice at about half time. And tea. The electric water heater will have to go on at full blast. It’s bath night and I ain’t getting wet in cold water for anyone’s sake. The electric heater in my cellar will be on as I hate to sit at my computer and freeze. (I have my own “man cave” in the cellar.) All the batteries that need recharging will be doing just that at the same time. I mean, if nobody else is using the electricity that will still be generated in the aforementioned time frame, then I will have it all to myself. So I intend to take full and absolute advantage of it.
Apparently, I won’t be alone. According to a survey poll in the Jyllands Posten, 58% of the Danes are not going to switch off their lights. 10% haven’t decided yet and the rest are
stark staring mad going to join in.
How this action is going to “save” the planet is beyond me but I daresay someone, somewhere, thinks it’s all rather marvellous and what a wonderful signal to send to our lying thieving global politicians, who know there is no real global climate crisis going on, that we really do care about the old globe and we don’t mind paying all the extra and unnecessary taxes, please Sir, can I have some more?
They are the ones who are permanently in the dark. No need to switch anything off there. How does the phrase go? “The lights are on, but there’s nobody home”. We’re going to have to rewrite that one. “The lights are off, but they’re in there, somewhere.”
I won’t be joining them.